It is important to identify a relationship that won’t work so as to save time, energy and other resources. Also, this will ensure that you do not miss the opportunities of being in a relationship that will actually work.
Most of the time, issues arising in a relationship are foundational issues, which means they are issues that have started before the relationship/marriage.
Here are some problems that won’t allow a relationship work.
- When one/both is too young or immature. Understand that there is a time when your state of mind is ready for a relationship. There is a time in life when you are able to set the right priorities and have the right sense of direction. If you choose too early, you are likely to choose wrong. The older a person is, the better the decision and the more likely the relationship will succeed.
- When one/ both are not grounded in godly principles. If they are not grounded in the word of God, they do not have the capacity to understand marriage because marriage is spiritual. To make marriage work, God’s word must be the only authority. Marriage is God’s idea, thus, man’s philosophy cannot apply in marriage.
- When the people involved in the relationship have not built friendship. Be careful of internet relationship/dating sites. If you marry on the internet, you are most likely entering a net.
- When the relationship was started for the wrong reasons. An example is money. If you marry for the wrong reason, then you most likely are marrying the wrong person.
- When the relationship is not properly defined. There should be no assumptions in a relationship. Be sure to ask the right questions. For example, ‘When’ will you marry me?
- When there is no accountability in the relationship. Accountability is required both in courtship and in marriage. Proverbs 15:22. Both parties must be accountable to a spiritual authority. It makes things easy.
- When there is no knowledge. Most of the troubled cases in relationships is lack of knowledge. Hosea 4:6. Couples need to read/attend seminars/listen to messages on relationships. One party being knowledgeable is not enough, both should be on the same level.
- When the feeling is not mutual, the relationship is endangered. The societal pressure to get married should not be an excuse to enter into marriage. Some people are more committed to the marriage than the other person. Never beg anyone to marry you. Don’t marry out of pity. The feeling must be mutual.
Armed with this knowledge, let’s go out and make our relationships work. You will have the marriage of your Dreams!