What Marriage is Not.

This message by our Mama Pastor Mildred will totally bless you. Enjoy
and Share…

The first thing, I need you to understand is that, marriage is not a necessary evil, marriage is a choice. When it comes to marriage especially for a woman, it is an assignment not a reward.


People have a lot of misconception about marriage. Today, we will be looking at what marriage is a part from what it is not.

1. Marriage is not a human invention.

Marriage is a God idea not a human invention and so, you cannot do it
outside of God, you need him to power marriage. An unbeliever does not
have the capacity to power marriage. He can try but eventually he will
get tired because everything you will be doing in marriage is what Jesus
will do for the Church.

Ephesians 5:22-33

“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.
For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the
church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits
to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave
himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with
water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant
church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and

In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own
bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever
hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as
Christ does the church— for we are members of his body.

“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”

2. Marriage should reflect the character of God.

1 John 4:8

“Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”
Love (God) is patient, love (God) is kind. It (God) does not envy, it
(God) does not boast, it (God) is not proud. It (God) does not dishonor
others, it (God) is not self-seeking, it (God) is not easily angered, it
(God) keeps no record of wrongs. Love (God) does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It (God) always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love (God) never fails.”

Marriage is not a union between two perfect people, it is between two
mature people. Marriage doesn’t change anyone. Who you are before you get married is who you will be in marriage. Marriage brings out who you really are and how much of God is formed in you. A marriage set on the right foundation should reflect the nature and character of God in you.

Marriage will test you, prune you and break you. Each, test, each pruning, each breaking makes you become more like Christ.

3. Marriage is Ministry

For believers, marriage is a ministry, it is service. As a woman, marriage is a commitment to help your husband and submit to him for the rest of your life. As a man, marriage is a commitment to love your wife and put her first for the rest of your life. Marriage is not a reward.
Marriage is not and should not be entered into with the mind set of:

“…Now I am married, I can rest. My husband/wife will take care of me…”

If you go in with that mind set, you will be thoroughly disappointed. Marriage is about giving not taking. Marriage is about bending, about sacrifices, about dying to yourself daily. It no longer becomes about
you but about him/her and us.


“And the two shall become one…”

4. Marriage is a responsibility.

1 Cor 7:33

“I want you to live as free of complications as possible. When you’re
unmarried, you’re free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master.

Marriage involves you in all the nuts and bolts of domestic life and in wanting to please your spouse, leading to so many more demands on your attention.

The time and energy that married people spend on caring for and
nurturing each other, the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God. I’m trying to be helpful and make it as easy as possible for you, not make things harder.

All I want is for you to be able to develop a way of life in which you
can spend plenty of time together with the Master without a lot of

Marriage is work and it comes with a lot of responsibilities. Marriage requires hard work and dedication. You will need to make a decision to make it work. If you are not ready to work, then marriage is not for you.

1 Cor 7:27-28

” I think it would probably be best to stay just as you are. Are you
married? Stay married. Are you unmarried? Don’t get married. But there’s certainly no sin in getting married, whether you’re a virgin or not. All I am saying is that when you marry, you take on additional stress in an already stressful time, and I want to spare you if possible.”

5. Divorce is not an option.

In these present times, divorce is becoming a common trend. A lot of
people enter marriage with a mindset of

‘…If it doesn’t work I will leave…’

This is not permissible for a believer. For a believer, divorce is and should never be an option. Marriage requires work but if you are willing to partner with God in doing marriage, then you can and will have the marriage of your dreams.

Matthew 11:30

“My yoke is easy and my burden us light..”

Marriage is not easy but YOUR marriage does not have to be hard.
May God help us all in Jesus name, AMEN!!!

If this blessed you, we encourage you to please share on all your social media handles. We would also love for you to fellowship with us at DAVID’S CHRISTIAN CENTRE

Our service times are:

Mainland: Fatgbems Filling station bus stop, Amuwo Odofin, Lagos.

Sundays 7.30 and 9am
Wednesdays 6.30pm

Island: Elegushi Bus stop, 3rd round about, Lekki.

Sundays 10 am
Tuesdays 6.30pm

You can find us on social media too
Instagram and Twitter @dccisland, @dcclagos

You can call us too on 08077714411
We cannot wait to hear from you…
Till next time, please say this COVENANT we have out loud with us,

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LDM with PK | Love Dating and Marriage | Online Store For Pastor Kingsley and Mildred Okonkwo Messages, Books, CDs, DVDs, Ebooks and other Resources

Online Store For Pastor Kingsley and Mildred Okonkwo Messages, Books, CDs, DVDs, Ebooks and other Resources